Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Name on Card

So I'm talking to a biz friend the other day on the phone and she starts cracking up. I'm like 'what what?'
You know when you fill out a credit payment form online and it says Name On Card?
How many of you realize that means YOUR name? No really. It wants you to put the name of the person who is listed on the card.
Know what? Some people have put: Chase, Bank of America, American Express Blue

How do you do Mr. Blue? Do you go by American Express or just American or is it A.E.?
Come on. You know it's funny.
Makes you just shake your head and smile, doesn't it?

Thursday, January 17, 2008

My Own Stupid

How many of you have ever had dirty dishes in the sink and company will be there in 5 minutes? Confession time: How many of you shove the dirty dishes in the oven for temporary cleaning?
I'm sure I'm not the only one guilty of this. Come on, I know at least a handful of you have done it.
Well, note to self, DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! Burnt plastic is not a smell you want first thing in the morning. All I have to say is praise God that the plastic wasn't sitting directly on the oven racks. But I don't think there will be a next time. LOL

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Phone calls

Ever have this happen to you?
You're sitting at home and someone calls. During the call you tell the person you need to go so call back in a few minutes. Their response is sure, are you home?
What?!? You called me remember.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Thoughts in my head

If the Waffle House (a southern restaurant) is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, then why are there locks on the doors?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why is it that it can be 70 degrees in the house and if the sun is out it feels warm but if it's cloudy then it feels cold? It's still the same freakin' temperature!!!!

Label on shampoo: Do not store below 40 degrees. Question: How often do you freeze your shampoo?

Why do we tell our kids nite nite don't let the bed bugs bite and then expect them to sleep (with the imaginary bugs) oh but by the way there are no monsters. What?

Friday, January 11, 2008

Size Doesn't Matter

We recently got a puppy. A papillion. For those who don't know what that is, it's a lap dog. I didn't know what it was either.
Well she weighs less than 10 lbs right now. When I take her outside she insists on trying to chase cars. Each time a car goes by she perks her ears up and runs to the end of her leash.
I'm like, what are you going to do if you catch one? Wrap your teeth around the bumper and hang on for dear life?
Plus she barks like she's a big dog. Our neighbor's dog was outside the other day (he can knock down a grown man) and it started barking at our puppy. She stands up and just started yapping right back, like 'bring it on big boy'. I was almost rolling on the ground.

Gotta Laugh

Bumper Sticker on a large 'monster truck'
If you can't stop then smile as you go under.

Friday, January 4, 2008

Warning Labels

Have you ever looked at a warning label and thought "Why is that warning necessary?"
I'll tell you why, because someone actually tried it! Why else would manufacturers have to put such stupid warnings? They have to protect themselves from those around us that only use 1 % of their brain.
Examples: On the back of a tube of hemorrhoid cream- "Do not eat"
On a bottle of baby lotion "For external use only"
On an aerosol cleaning can "Do not store above 120 degrees"
Are these actual problems?
'Hey let's put this cream on a bagel and see how it tastes.'
'Sarah's got a sore throat, let's put some lotion in her throat and see if that helps.'
I don't have a quote for the last one but-where in YOUR HOUSE gets up to 120 degrees (besides the oven). If it's over 120 in your house then you don't need aerosol cleaners you need a freakin air conditioner!